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The New Yorker

Humor & Cartoons

Shouts & Murmurs

A Vaccination Parable

You’ve got to read the literature!
Shouts & Murmurs

Date Ideas for Couples in Long-Term Relationships

Go about your normal evening, but with a candle lit.
Shouts & Murmurs

F.A.Q.s About the W.N.B.A.

As a man, I’ve noticed that some of the women in the W.N.B.A. are getting a lot of attention. But the thing is, I want attention.
Shouts & Murmurs

“Emma” Unrated

In which Jane Austen’s Miss Emma Woodhouse is bestirred by “Jackass” ’s Mr. Knoxville upon his presentation of a “Fire-Hose Rodeo.”
Shouts & Murmurs

Why I Left the City and Moved My Family Into an Inflatable Bounce House

Buy a house in this market? Do I look like a complete chucklehead?

Cartoon Caption Contest

We provide a cartoon, you provide a caption. Enter the contest, rate submissions, or vote on finalists.
Peruse a gallery ofcartoons from the issue »

Daily Cartoons

1/15

“There’s a fine line between sun-kissed and sun-dried.”
Cartoon by Daniela Gilsanz

Bigger Boat

Shouts & Murmurs

Other Sharks in Your Area

A nurse shark, a shark named Josh who will correct your pronunciation of “Kyiv” and “Saoirse Ronan,” and more.
Shouts & Murmurs

Why You Should Not Snorkel

When you are in the ocean, you are exposing yourself to the extremely likely possibility that you will be eaten by a shark.
Shouts & Murmurs

Life Advice with Animal Analogies

Live like a fish? A mountain lion? A butterfly? A beaver? A menagerie of unideal options.
Shouts & Murmurs

Shark Tweets

Not really sure what this whole Twitter thing is about. Can I eat it?

Comics

Sketchpad

New Coins in the Crypto Reserve

Forget gold. Time to stock up on Eggcoin (very valuable) and Scamcoin (not a scam).
Blitt’s Kvetchbook

Epstein Island Revealed

A not-so-fine mess.
Sketchpad

Fragrances of Presidents Past

Now that Trump has released his new scent, “Victory 45-47” ($249), it’s time to sniff the competition.
Shouts & Murmurs

We’ve Lost Direction

Finding a way through the past, the present, and the unspeakable.

More Humor

Shouts & Murmurs

It’s Time to Check In for Your D.E. Eye Exam

This vision test is far from routine—don’t forget that racism starts in the retinas.
Shouts & Murmurs

Super-Fun Romantic Sexy Beach Read

A little Proust, a little cancer, but in a light and sexy way. Isn’t melancholy the new quirky?
Shouts & Murmurs

The Aging Millennial’s Guide to Summer

Read an autofiction novel written by someone your age about how they’re way too old to be this pathetic and single.
Shouts & Murmurs

The Psychic Significance of Your Wordle Starting Word

B U I L D: You have four hundred and ninety-nine LinkedIn connections, which is tantalizingly close to the coveted “500+” distinction.
Shouts & Murmurs

The Diary of Anna Franco

Señor Larry David is nice to have allowed me and my family to hide from ICE in his attic. But why does he yell at the TV all the time?
Shouts & Murmurs

Package Tracking Takes a Dark Turn in “Paper Towels”

When an online order goes missing, employees are often blamed. But how should they be punished? Now premium users get to decide.
Shouts & Murmurs

Notes to the Editor of a Watch Commercial

“Minute hand looking good.”
Shouts & Murmurs

Definitive Proof That Cats and Babies Actually Are the Same

Both are trying to kill me.
Shouts & Murmurs

All My Dentist’s Feedback So Far

Welcome to the lifelong struggle of dealing with our creator’s sickest joke—putting rotting bones in our eating holes.
Shouts & Murmurs

Packing Lists for Your Upcoming Emotional Journeys

Be prepared for anything with D.I.Y. travel Martini ingredients and your twenty-seven nighttime skin-care products.